To the Universe:
Cc: The World, The United States of America
To Whom it May Concern,
Here are some reasons you should write books:
1.) You must.
2.) You can't help yourself (see #1).
3.) You have stories bursting out of you.
4.) You'd feel like a wormy raisin if you didn't.
5.) You're damned good at it.
6.) You're cursed or blessed (see #1 and #2).
Here are some reasons you shouldn't write books:
1.) You're already famous and think you might as well.
2.) You think it sounds like fun.
3.) Your mom says you'd be a best-seller.
4.) You have a cool idea for one.
5.) You've done everything else, and want to expand your resume.
6.) You're an ex-supermodel (see Tyra Banks).
Thank you for your time, Dear Universe. Please do something about this.
Yours most sincerely,
Hanna C. Howard
(With a respectful nod to facepalm.org)